The Hot Spot

Anyone Interested in buying Bleach manga volumes 1-26 for $3 dollars each? Leave me a message if you're interested. They're all wrapped in plastic manga covers so that the covers don't get greased or dirty if you're a messy reader or plan on lending it out to friends. Tell your friends about this great deal as well.

And so, Reconstruction will begin at 10am Monday, June 8th, 2009.

I figured that since most people don't read LJ anymore, I can use these posts as a bridge to music that I'm listening to. heh.

This weeks artist is BENI - Kiss Kiss Kiss.


Oh yeah! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO: CINTHIA and NICK!

So here I am, again, in the computer lab at my school, just doing nothing because I have a gigantic gap between classes (or just 2 1/2 hours.) I haven't updated in the past 2 weeks so I figured I might as well.

School has been a big mess with me. I haven't had any motivation to go to classes although I try to go. I think I'm almost maxed out on absenses your alloted from almost all my classes and its only been 3 1/2 weeks. There's just something I find uncomfortable about the classes. I'm interested in the topics, but I'm falling behind on my work. I didn't have my Marketing textbook until this Tuesday, which means I went 3 weeks without a book, that basically was 6 chapters. I'm glad he gives outlines in the form of powerpoints and pdfs, but those are useless if you don't understand what's going on or his explanations.

Financial Accounting is extremely tough. Usually I don't have a hard time with accounting, but there was a year of no accounting classes and because of that and my lack of refreshing my memory, there's a lot of hazzy stuff going on when my teacher tells us to do things like an income statement or bank reconciliation. even something small like a cash flow chart seems like a huge undertaking. I think I really need a crash course on my Principles of accounting.

Outside of school, I've been doing nothing really productive. All I do is spend my money on manga, which I haven't been reading because of the workload I get from school. I went two weeks without lunch during school days because I basically can't spend the money, it has to all go to my bank account to pay for preorders. I think I should definitely consider saving money for future preorders so I don't go through the same crap next time.

Speaking of money, I need a job. I've been unemployed for the past year and although I like the freedom and open days, I don't have anything to do to fill them out. With my spending habits and school, I need some extra cash to have in my pocket. I can't live on allowance until after college, that's just irresponsible and rediculously lazy of me. I'm grateful that i'm getting allowance because some people don't, but a job would be even better.

Food has been a no go. I keep going up and down in weight like the tides and waves of the ocean. I'll weigh myself one day and i'll have lost 5-10lbs, and then a couple of days later gain it all or more back. Again, it only seems like i'm eating 1 or 2 meals a day. Snacks are literally nonexistant and breakfast is something i have to force myself to eat in order to function in the morning. Today I had couple of grapes and some bread and a cup of joe. I would love to get lunch but I have no money so there won't be any eating until maybe 5pm, when i get home, so thats a 9 hour gap between my "breakfast" and what would be lunch. not good.

On tuesday I was watching the biggest loser on NBC. Damn, it actually is kind of motivating to watch these people, who are WAY bigger than me work out probably twice/three times more than me. It makes me wonder if I were to start exercising for an hour a day and restrict the variety of food I eat will I lose the 10-25lbs that they lost in there first week. Now I know losing that much lbs in one week is pretty unhealthy and probably bad for you, but you have to understand that I've been a fat person for so long. over 10 years of fat weighing me down from doing things that all my friends can/want to do. It sucks being fat and I know that I have to change and become the normal kid I was when I was younger, but it's when I start to think about the things I have to do that I start to get overwhelmed with everything. I'm expecting to do a 180% but that never works for me and even though I want to go slow, there are always people who say my way is no good way. I wish they could just see how hard it is to be fat and try to lose weight. Its a lot more mentally challenging for a fat person to lose weight than you might think. Sure you think it'll be a breeze since your skinny and think if you were fat you could lose weight. You already have that mentality of health and wanting to do things. I don't know what i'm complaining about, I'm just really sick of myself for letting this go on for so long and It might come off as me being a bitchy but fuck that. I'm fat and I need to slim up!

I guess i'll end it here. Happy Birthday to september people, Deshaun, and whoever else =)

See you next break!

I've decided that with these huge gaps I have i'm my schedule for school that I would spend it updating this livejournal because its been a while since you've all heard from me, and i'm sure some of you would like to know what's been going on in life.

I'm currently at the computer lab in the library building at school. My next class is at 230pm. It is my Financial Accounting Class. Its going to be a real challenge for me because normally I can tolerate someone's accent when they're talking, but my Professor has the thickest chinese accent I've ever heard when she speaks english and it makes it a challege to really follow what she's trying to say. On tuesday i didn't go over the second half of our lecture because people kept raising their hands to figure out what she had previously said. I would love to replace the class with any other professor, but it's not an option since registration's over and even before then all of the other sections were closed. I don't think the materials hard, I think figuring out what she's saying will be more of a challenge. I shouldn't be bashing on her accent though. She's pretty successful with her accounting job at her firm and she's just teaching on the side, something I hope I can do as well after I get my degree.

So for those who don't know, I'm currently going to Baruch College, majoring in Accountancy. This FALL2008 term's courses that I am attending are:
ACC3202 (Accounting Information Systems)
ACC3000 (Financial Accounting 1 or Intermediate Accounting 1)
ENG4300 (Romanticism) (English will be my minor and his is my capstone)
LAW3102 (Law of Business Organization)
MKT3000 (Marketing Foundations)

I have definitely noticed that when you take courses revolving around your major, the workload tends to increase twofolds. I thought I could just be half ass like last semester and get good grades, but these professors are really working my ass off. I have a project due in 4 out of the 5 classes, have to give presentations in 2 of the 5, write papers for 4 of the 5, and all classes have adopted the 3 "midterm" plan in which i'll be tests 3 times rather then small tests, midterm and final. I really need to step up this semester because I need to have a good GPA in order to get into Graduate School here. All the best to myself!

With this hectic schedule that I have, I barely have time to really eat. You'd think I would lose weight from all this starvation, but I think my body's tricked itself into storing energy from the meals I have so I can blow steam and run through a day. I would really like to at least eat Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner, but that I can't even do. Here's the run down:

Monday: Wake up, Do the hygiene thing, take a shower, go to first class, class ends with 25 minutes to get to second class 3 floors down, go to cafeteria to get coffee black no sugar, go to second class, get out of second class, go down to cafeteria to buy a snack (sometimes not done due to time constraints of academic faults aka I need to read or study) go to 3rd class which is 1hr15min apart from 2nd, get out at 5pm, get home at about 6pm, do some HW, browsing internet, eat dinner around 8, watch tv, play with computer, do some reading for the next day, hygiene, then sleep.

Tuesday: Wake Up earlier, Hygiene, take shower, go to first class, class ends at noon, kill sometime because second class is at 230 (to which i will either walk around manhattan area, most likely walk down to the union square area), get a drink because finger food should only be reserves to ice cream and snack bars which i have neither, or i'll stay around campus and do things like go to the computer lab or study in the library), go to 2nd class, get out around 4, get home around 5, some free time until 8 when dinner is ready so i will play with computer or read some books (manga or school related), eat dinner, watch tv (sometimes while eating dinner =D), some more playing around on computer, read for tomorrow, hygiene, go to sleep.

Wednesday: Repeat Monday
Thursday: Repeat Tuesday
Friday-Sunday: Bull Shit around.

I suppose I could substitute any gap that is larger then an hour with a meal, but the food around here is terrible. I do like halal food, but I don't want to eat that every day, plus it leaves an odor after you eat that isn't that pleasant to smell while your sitting in a class full of students.

Hrm, I think I'll end my woes here and continue the next time I come to the computer lab. I need to study now.

Ah, so it's been almost a month since my last post. It always ends up sounding so grim or self-bashing, but I can't help what I write. Well, maybe I can, but venting is okay.

Summer classes ended on July 3rd. Did pretty well in both my Macroeconomics and Statistics classes even though I skipped out on 2 days each. I think I prefer learning more in small amounts of time, I feel as though it'll stay fresh in my head for a while. Been almost 2 weeks since school's ended and I still remember most of the stuff I learned. The only problem I would say I have about school is that in order to get into Zicklin School for business at Baruch, I had to complete those 2 courses and then apply to Zicklin. I won't be getting a response until the 28th, which means I can't register for any accounting courses until then. Kind of sucks, but there's nothing I can do about it. =/

Lately I have been staying home, trying to concentrate on a diet that will work for me. I know I need to start exercising sometime but at the moment I'm just concentrating on what's good and whats bad for me as well as portion control and moderation. When I eat, it's usually a lot. I get a bowl of noodles or a plate of food, I feel instantly that I have to finish everything and that shouldn't be the way I think about food.

I bought a laptop from my friend around January, currently using it, lol. It's gotten me even lazier in that I have a table stationed to the side of my bed so that when I wake up in the morning, all I have to do is turn sideways, lift up the screen and start using it right away. I've been recently trying to lower my usage or it, rather go back to using my desktop and using my laptop for outdoor purposes. I have yet to actually bring this laptop anywhere there. So much for portability.

I'm hoping to get a cyclo ds from Nick soon so that I won't have to spend money on games. I probably will still buy games, but only stuff I really want to keep or that I like.

These past couple of months have been crazy on my wallet, specifically my cards. Earlier in the year, I had pre-ordered a ridiculous amount of Manga using my card. Since the site doesn't charge until items are shipped, I thought it would be fine to do so. Since March, I've received 70 volumes of different titles. This also combined with the 40 volumes of manga I managed to buy in stores. This definitely solidifies my status as an otaku, or rather a Comic Book Geek, lol. Its a hobby I really enjoy and I don't think it's a phase.

With the recent bombardment of manga, I haven't been reading any actual literature lately. The last novel I had completed was World War Z. I began to read the first of the Dexter novels, but I just stopped for no reason. I want to start reading more regular text novels, or even classic literature stuff like clockwork or even some Copperfield stuff. I need some recommendations.

Me + Video Games = Nonexistent. Lately I haven't been into console games at all. They're just sitting there on my rack, collecting dust. I've only been playing portable games and not that often either. Maybe i've grown out of video games. Or maybe all those years of gamesharking has dulled the anticipation and struggle that gamelovers crave for. hah Whatever reason it is, I should check in on that later on.

Otakon is coming up in about a month. I think this'll be my 6th year going. I'm pretty excited because even though there are those scary moments and places, there are way more nicer, cooler things going on. Hopefully this year I won't be cooped up doing convention things as much. I do like some of them, but anime screenings, gaming room, movies, non of that really interests me. When I go, I hit up the dealers room, artist alley, and more recently industry panels. Aside from those, there's nothing else I would do. I'm glad that last year I spent more time with my roomies and hopefully this year will be the same. =)

I haven't spoken to any friends lately and I know i'm part to blame. I've only been hanging out with close friends and some fellow otakus. I don't know, I just haven't been connected to anybody from the old days as of lately since I've been trying to get my life on track. The last time I hungout with High School friends was at Cinthia's 21st birthday, well over a year ago. The last time I hung out with DDR related friends was maybe Anthony's Christmas party, almost 3 years ago. I hate to associated friends into different groups but I just can't help but do so. there's no other way I could really describe it. I'd really like to at least keep in contact with people, Anthony, Jeff, people I used to be really good pals with.

Alright, time to eat dinner.

Well, its been two months since there's been any updates so I'll just give you all a run down.

I did pretty horrible this spring semester. I wish my grades were better but there's nothing I can do about it now.

My grandfather passed away on May 21st. The wake was on the 27th and the actual burial was the following day. Horrible times and I hope the rest of my family has coped with the loss by now.

I started summer classes on June 2. Been 2 weeks so far and I think I'm doing good. Midterms this week so I'll have to study like a nerd for them.

School end around the first week of July so by then I hope I will have found something to do. A job or whatever else there is to keep me busy.

I'm fat so I gotta start working out or rather be more active in my daily life. School and them home shouldn't be my life with staying home on the weekends.

These come off sounding more like notes. oh wells. Till next time.

Been a while since my last update so I'll fill you all in on what I've been up to. Please continue to read and maybe comment if you have the time or want to put your two cents in.

Since my last blog entry I've been doing nothing that has been proactive. I have yet to find a job because I don't even bother to go out and look for one. I've reverted to being just a full-time student with no job and I don't like it at all. I'm living off allowance that I'm ashamed to even be getting because, lets be frank here, I'm 21 years old. At this point in my life I should be making my own money and maybe contributing to paying off some bills here and there. Unfortunately I am not, rather my parents are paying for water that we all use, gas that heats my room more than others, electricity, which 60% of the bill comes from the computers in my room being on 24/7, and cellphone, which my dad decided to pay for reluctantly. I know my parents are spoiling my siblings and I but considering that I'm the youngest of 3 children, I think thats really embarrassing and I'm ashamed at how my family is at the moment. My dad's getting older as each year passes and that doesn't help with the workload that he does. My mom doesn't make much either but she works herself so hard so we can live this faux luxury.

This spring semester, I must admit, has been hard as hell on me. I feel like a retard this semester for some odd reason. I skipped a lot of classes in the first month of classes and I feel like I'm paying for it now that there's only a couple of weeks left in the semester. My grades have not been as hot as I want them to be and this won't look good if I don't kick-start that fire under my ass. I think the thing that bothers me the most about how school's turned out this semester is that I did this to myself, you know. I lack discipline and motivation to do things in school, maybe even in life, and the fact that it takes "on the edge" situations like almost flunking all my classes or anything on the edge to make me work is not something I should be even practicing. I need some kind of reason for me to keep up outstanding work and diligence because if I just wait around like I'm doing, I don't think I'll ever get anywhere in life.

Lately my weight has been a serious issue that I have been neglecting. Two years ago I had finally squashed all qualms I had about my body, that I finally learned to like who I was on the outside. Since then I've gained 50lbs, which is really unhealthy and not good at all, and I'm fearing for myself because it seems as though I can't control myself. I'm always sleeping late, sometimes can't even sleep because this fat is just bothering me. Clothes don't fit well and it makes me feel like I've fucked up. My health has definitely deteriorated and its not even from smoking or drinking, which I don't do either. This unhealthy lifestyle I have really bums me out and no matter how many times I try to resolve something and plan stuff out, execution becomes a huge step that I can't seem to even put a foot on. Motivation is the key, Inspiration, something that will touch you into making an effort. That's what they all say. Maybe I haven't found that umph that I'm looking for. Perhaps that's why I'm not motivated. I don't know. I really feel like I need some help from someone, some guidance in this mess thats become of me. I don't want to die young or get diabetes or other fat related problems.

Life itself hasn't been all to great either. As I mentioned before, I don't have a job. I think the reason for this is because of many things:
1. I lack confidence in myself. (Attributed to physical and mental image I've built of myself)
2. I might have a social phobia. (Some should already know that when it comes to meeting new people, I'm the shyest person in the room. I put shyguys from mario to shame.)

I always feel like I can't get anything because I don't even try to look at all the possibilities. Its like a shelf. There might be something tempting and great on that top shelf, but I've only been settling on that middle and lower shelf I can reach, never trying to even touch what's above.

My grandfather is in the hospital, which I can't believe. My mom said he woke up in the morning and just fell on the floor. Apparently when he was rushed to the hospital, there was a buildup of fluids in his brain and they had to drill holes in his head to relieve the pressure brought on by the fluid's buildup. I'm relieved that he didn't die at his home, but now its his battle in the hospital. The doctor's say he's got to cough the fluids in his lungs out also since the backup had done that. It's all on him and even though we're suppose to lend moral support to him, I don't feel like I need to or know how to. I don't know whats wrong with me. Kinship is suppose to be big in Asian culture, but how do you support someone you hardly ever saw or spent time with? The blood might be there but if memories don't exist, is there really a connection?

I got problems and I hope there will be solutions soon because I don't think these should be lingered upon too long. Its so late in the night that I can't even sleep because I have an early class and I know if I tried, I'd be tossing and turning and thinking too much to get any sort of rest. I might as well stay up all night for today and try to get sleep later for Tuesday. sigh.

So normally I try to write something in LJ at least once a month and I see I haven't wrote anything since July. I guess I can run stuff over a paragraph each.

In June I was officially declared a graduate of BMCC, yay! I also went to anime expo which was a really big change since the only anime convention i've ever been to was otakon and Big Apple Anime Festival back in 2003. Being able to fly to California for the first time and hanging out with friends was enough for me to enjoy my time.

In July I pretty much didn't do anything other then work for the first 2 weeks, then i took leave again for Otakon. This was, by far, the best Otakon i've been to. Sure people go to conventions to see concerts or watch anime or buy everything, but this year I decided to hangout with roommates, which was a change since Nick knows i'm practically a loner at these conventions. It was great to have formed a sort of bond, friends that you can see every year or hang with now and again.

In August I was preparing for school at Baruch College. Nothing really special, just tried to get my act together, focus on academics and prepare myself for this new environment. If some of you may recall, anything new to me takes a while to adjust to, be it a place or game or people. I also quit my job around the end of august because my schedule just wouldn't let me, plus it gave me an excuse to leave that hellhole. =)

In September I had a lot of bumps on my road. It was hard adjusting to the environment and with my schedule changing practically everyday for the first 2 weeks i was feeling really hesitant about my future here. I'm still pretty hesitant now but i'll worry about that later. This is also when I started the great TV madness, which is what I call the start of my TV downloading craze. If you ever come over to my house and use my computer, the BT will always be up downloading some show, not like i have much time to watch them anyways.

In October I celebrated my 21st birthday! Old enough to drink, does that qualify as a milestone if i've been drinking before age? It was okay, nothing grand or spectacular. Just spent time with my close friends and lazied out. I enjoy simple things like just being able to chill with friends then to have crazy parties or drunken madness. That's how i roll.

In November I spent so much money shopping that now i feel like i'm constantly in debt despite the fact that I am not. Thanksgiving was one to remember since I had to eat at home as well as at my friend's house. I was beyond stuffed at the end of the day and I felt as if I was going to explode if my belt wasn't on. That same day we stayed up all night waiting for Black Friday event to happen only to leave after witnessing the craziness of it. Ah good times.

Now it is december. School is basically over. I took 3 finals in a span of 24hrs and now I have my last one at 1030 today. Instead of studying, I am writing a blog that is long overdue. I'm also running on a total of 10 hours of sleep since monday morning. I think when i'm done today I go book shopping then go home and pass out for the proceeding 15 hours.

So in case I don't write again for a while, I hope everyone has a MERRY CHRISTMAS, A HAPPY HANNAKUH, HAPPY KWANZA, HAPPY HOLIDAYS, and HAPPY NEW YEARS! I hope your party goes well Anthony, I hope everyone gets what they are looking for. I hope that you all have a great time hanging out with one another and see you all around!

-William (Willyboy/Bill) Chiu

Waking up at 6 in the morning by my father, i groggily got up take a shower, brush my teeth, you know, the usual stuff in the morning. Proceeding to breakfast my nerves began to kick in as the thought of flight pops into my mind like a car's blinker. I haven't rode on a plane since I was 5 and I have very vague memories of it. After breakfast, at around 8:30am I call a taxi service to come and pick me up, giving instructions to drive to JFK Airport, Terminal 6.
As I entered the car, I had a very weird feeling something might not be right. My driver keeps talking Spanish to his communicator as to where the terminal 6 was. I knew he was asking that because I still remembered some of my years of Spanish and also because he kept saying terminal 6 in English. Well, for what felt like eternity, we finally arrive there at 9:15am. As we pulled up, there's hundreds of people outside, lined up, in a hurry or just standing around from mass confusion. I took it upon myself to ask one of the employees as to where i should go and ended up lining up behind what seemed like 50-70 people, all getting their bags checked. At the end of the line, I'm thinking this might take a while but before i was able to set my mind on that I get a call from my friends I was suppose to meet up with.
They're asking where am I and when I told them I was at the back of the line, we were already quarreling because apparently they were at the end of a line as well. I ended up leaving my line to look for them and there they were, near the front entrance, on a much shorter line to get their bags checked. I'm thinking, arghs, too early in the morning for crap to be happening, so we just waited on the line. When my friend and I reach the counter, we get our bags marked for Long Beach, California and get our Boarding passes. Since my other 2 friends checked their bags before us, it was time to go find our gate. Though we were early by what seemed like 2-3 hours, we took it upon ourselves to just explore the terminal, get some food, and kill sometime before we got to board.
There we were, in the hustling, bustling crowd of civilians all heading to the peaks of their agendas, hundreds of people doing so as we slowly make our way around the terminal observing the screens to see what gate our flight would be at. There was none listed. Friend 2 takes the time to get into a line for the customer service counter. Half hour later we were only able to find out our plane wasn't scheduled to a gate yet. We ended up sitting around, eating a little bit, waiting for 11:55am plane to come and board us.
It's apparent that something was wrong when at 1030am, our plane was delayed to 1:30pm. That was a total setback because had our plane departed at the scheduled time, we would have been in Long Beach by 2pm Cali time, which would have gave us more day to spend for registrations and ticket pickups. Instead, our plane ride was delayed even further to depart at 2:30 due to a "Sick Passenger" from the previous flight, which none of us saw. Then we had to wait for a steward to come since they were missing only one person. I tell you, this is Bullshit.
After all the delay and disarray, we were air-bound at 3PM. At first I started getting ridiculously nauseated from the change in altitude, to the point where i took the bag out of the pocket, but i ended up not barfing, which was a huge accomplishment in itself. During the flight I dozed off maybe twice and woke up an hour later, which was good i guess since the flight was 5 hours. The remaining 3 hours I spent watching tv, particularly Dirty Jobs. I gotta tell you, Mike Rowe is a man's man. That guys got more balls then most, easily for doing all these things.
At around 5PM we landed at the Long Beach Airport, 8PM New York time. We go our separate ways, me and friend number 1 taking a taxi to our hotel that near the airport and friend 2 goes with his girlfriend to their hotel across the street from the convention center, which is 5-10 miles away from our hotel. When the taxi driver was pulling up to our hotel he decides to mention that there's a shuttle that takes you from airport to hotel for free. Ass.
We get checked in and take a taxi to the convention center which ran us 20 bucks, meaning we'd be spending 40 dollars a day to get to the convention center and back everyday for the 4 days we were there. We got into the line, which was surprisingly short for preregistration, which was actually just luck because after we registered and got on the line for premier tickets there was a huge line. The Premier ticket line itself was huge and moving at a snail's pace. The staff said that the booth would close its gates at 8PM and since we were so far behind there was no point in waiting at 730 for the tickets. We got off the line and walked around a little since there was still plenty sun outside. At 8:30pm we found this dinner that we ended up eating everyday at for the next couple days. After dinner was over, we went our seperate ways, friend 2 going up his hotel with his girlfriend while friend 1 and I waited for a cab to pick us up in the lobby. We get back at 1130 at the hotel and I began my planning for Friday, Day 1 of the convention. When it was 1230, it was time to hit the sack since it was decided at dinner that we would wait at 7 in the morning on the premier ticket line to get ours. We retired that night with high hopes of fun and achievement, not knowing the troubles and tribulations to come during the proceeding days.

I've always wanted to writing something meaningful, useful, or sophisticated on my livejournal, but i always fail to do so. It's like when i try to think of something to write about everything just floods out my brain and through my fingers and it'll project a bunch of gibberish that sometimes comes out incoherent. It's really frustrating because it's just one of those things i want to do at the moment. I know that if i were to try and sit down and compose my thoughts into writing i'll lose interest in what im trying to write and i'll end up scrapping the idea, which is why mose of my stuff comes out this way.

School is finally over. I have been in BMCC for 3 years. Despite the rocky first year I had, i did manage to graduate with a 3.3 gpa, which i guess it's good considering the amount of effort i put into it. I finished this semester with a B-, B+, and 2 As. My graduation was on June 1st. I didn't go, simply because I don't feel that obtaining an Associates degree is an accomplishment, rather a stepping stone to the bigger degree which matters to me, a Bachelors degree. Obtaining that would be ideal since thats it, that's the standard I need to achieve the most minimal of job placements. For me i have ambitions of going to grad school, but im still very undecided in what i want to do. I've been trying to convince myself to do accounting because that would be good for my financial needs, but I've tried looking into the future, 10 years, 15 years ahead, trying to see how my life would be if i were to do accounting for all those years and it drives me mad to think that i'll be crunching numbers for a living. I want to do things that are more laxed, more free with less constraints and rules. I would love do find something and do that, but those kind of jobs don't pay much and i, like a lot of people, need to make money, not just for myself, but for the people who depend on me. Its that time in my life where i need to start taking responsibility for many things. My mom turned 50 in February. She's still working her low-wage job because at this point my mother and father are the only financial support in this family. my siblings don't contribute to anything around the house and as much as i'd like to had over my pay each week to my parents, i needed it to live, to do the basic necessary things, like buying lunch, groceries, all that stuff for my family. There's very little left and my parents tell me to save, but it doesn't go well with me since, as hard as it is to admit, i'm a compulsive spender.

Ah, there's so much more i want to write because there's probably a million things i want to get off my chest, but i'll just have to continue this some other time.

So it's funny that i look at the right side of my page and it was still the calender for december. Means i haven't written anything since then. Don't mind the order of sequence the paragraphs are in, it's just whatever pops into my head at the time.

Hmm, for starters, christmas sucked ass. I don't think i'll ever make friends via interenet. I feel really used but w/e. I'm not taking this shit from anyone anymore. Basically I was clicking with this girl I met on myspace. now, i know a lot of you are think, "Will, that's so stupid of you", I know, but i geuss i thought it was love at first sight. Anyways we talked a lot, over the summer, during the fall, and when winter came i bought her christmas gifts. I sent it to her, and she was happy, but then after a couple of days she stopped talking to me. Slowly but surely she just didn't respond. Then finally she's telling me to stop bugging her and that she never really liked me. I was hurt, just for the fact that I let myself be vulnerable to this girl and she didn't feel the same way i did for her. She used me. Wasn't cool at all. for a while in January I was really depressed, didn't do anything. Just stayed home whenever i had the chance. I eventually got over it really quick though, like 4-5 days. Just talked myself out of it, which is why i'm saying fuck you bitches over the internet. I'm gunna be tough as iron and if you think i'm opening up to you then forget you.

As for work I have been doing the same stuff, still getting gradual raises. I'm thinking about quiting after i've graduated from my college. I only started this job because i needed something to do afterschool last year since i got out early. I can't tell whether my schedule in my senior school will be stable or not, so i'll have to quit eventually.

I signed up to the gym around the beginning of january. It was good for the first two weeks, going every other day, but then i lost motivation and every chance i had to go I just skipped, came home and just didn't do anything. I have a couple more days left in my membership and i'm thinking should i renew it and apply for the year or not. See, the lack of motivation i have is due to the fact that i've learned to be comfortable in my own skin. People always say you won't be happy unless your comfortable in your own skin, and i wasn't for most of my teenage years. I was always big, which wasn't cool. I gradually learned to just shun out the negative and only take in the positive, which was my reason to not care about my size, so long as i'm comfortable. Unfortunately, here I am, 20 years old and weighing over 200 pounds. As of lately i've been faced with a lot of scrutiny about my weight and it's actually getting to me. I mean, I'm comfortable in my skin, but i also feel that i want to have that six pack, those big biceps, the broad chest, just the good physique in general. I say all these things, but i don't do any of it because: a) i'm lazy and if it requires effort i don't exert enough for anything to be effective, and b) like i've been saying before, i'm comfortable in my skin. There's also another reason why I fail when it comes to losing weight, it's because most of the time I don't know what i'm doing. I would really love for someone to coach me through what I should be and shouldn't be eating/doing, but I need to learn how to depend on myself. I dunno if i'm making any sense now, but basically i'm a mess because i can't help myself.

Since school has started this week, i've been coming home extremely exhausted. Its as though my body forgot how going to school then work was like. Whenever I get home, I have enough energy to eat a little, do my hw, then take a shower and sleep, it's been the same cycle the whole weekday. I'm beginning to wonder if i can handle this semester.

I filed for graduation on wednesday. i'll be leaving BMCC with a AA in Liberal Arts then i'll be going to a senior college for Accounting. It's a good thing i'm taking Principles for accounting now, that way don't gotta take it in the other schools. I'm crazy aren't I? Taking accounting as an elective here.

As far as books are concerned I have lots to read. The next book I plan on reading is "A Clock Work Orange" and after that I plan on reading the "Art of War". I've had both bood for a while, just never got around to reading them. On top of those I still have a big pile of clothes. I wouldn't mind you guys suggesting me some good books to read.

I haven't been hanging out with my friends lately. I think the last time I did was 3 weeks ago. I know i'm always complaining about hanging out with people, but this time it's really funky. I mean I try to chill with people but nothing, or rather everyone's out doing their own thing. It's cool though, but it would be nice to chill with people once in a while.

School, My classes are Principles for Accounting II, General Astronomy, Short Stories, Asian American History. Principles for Accounting II is continuation of Accounting I but we talk about partnerships and corportations, General Astronomy is what the title says, Short Stories we just read a lot of them and do comparisons to other things. It's cool cause everyone in my class is very resourceful for books. They've all read a fair amount of classics. Asian American History is a look at the asian population back then when we first started living in america, the history behind it, you know.

Alright, well for now that's about all I can think of. let me go use the bathroom now for and undetermined reason. Peace out.

Finals suck!

Word, I had my Biology Final at 10 today, finished it in 20 minutes. It was actually a lot easier then I though it would be. I studied all morning long since 6am. I don't want to jinx it though because a lot of things that seem easy might actually be a trick. It's happened to me before. I took a test once that I thought was easy and I ended up doing bad, but passing, on it.

Ah, so I just finished taking my Accounting Final and That was somewhat challenging. It's just cause I couldn't remember the proper way of writing a bank reconciliation and I forgot the terms i was suppose to use for the journal entries for them so I ended up making up accounts that would sound similar. At least he's giving partial credit. I'd hope that I did well on this final. I did good on the other tests during the semester so this shouldn't be any different.

As for the rest of the week I got a geography final I gotta take tomorrow, so i'll study up on that, but i'll have to finish this research paper that was due on the 13th. I'm lucky my teacher's a lenient dude. I just haven't had the motivation to write something. It's pretty simple really, just 3-4 pages double spaced about any story we read in class. If you guys like short stories, read "A Rose for Emily" by William Faulkner. It's so twisted, yet there's some charm to it I like. Maybe it's the style of the writer.

So yup, paper and Geography final tomorrow and I'm finished. Actually, I still gotta come in on wednesday to pick up papers from english teacher, but after that, i'm done! I can finally start playing those games i've been queueing at home, all those volumes of manga i haven't finished, all the novels i never got a chance to read. I'm gunna keep myself occupied during this winter break. Plus i'll probably join a gym or something, need to get back into shape, or in better shape.

How many people right now have papers due tomorrow and are, instead, on xanga, myspace, livejournal, facebook, just about everything else, procrastinating?!?

:) it's that time of year again. The holiday season. I liked how last year turned out so i'd like to do it again this year.

I would like to start by asking you for your addresses so I can send you guys christmas cards. I'd really appreciate it if all of you do, otherwise no problemo. I'll screen the comments so you won't have to worry about people stalking you.

Secondly Indicate whether you want to get a christmas gift. I'm serious about this one. You don't have to be modest or anything, Christmas is the holiday for giving! So you can also leave me a name of what you want or a wish list and i'll pick something out. I'll ship it out to you if I have to, but meeting up and exchanging gifts wouldn't be a bad idea. We get to chill if anything. So to everyone, bring it on!!!! =)

This whole last week was very crazy. I had mad tests and papers due on Monday tuesday and wednesday then on thursday I waited 12 hours for the raffling of the ps3s at circuit city. Didn't win. All i got were many hours of painful standing along with the cold wet rain running down my face, clothes, etc. Can you imagine prunes? Because that's what my toes looked like.

Had to come into work on friday and that was a pain on my heels. They felt as if with every step my heels were splitting in two, as though I had an axe to each heel and any step on the floor would drive that sucker right into my marrow.

Saturday wasn't much help seeing as though I went out, but at least i had some comfortable sneakers on. Then Later that day I went to the sports authority by my house with my friends, picked up some camping chairs, and took the train to the nintendo store where we camped for the wii. Other then the freezing weather outside during the early morning/late night, It was pretty fun. Played some settlers, some scrabble, talked about mad random shit. It also helped that the store across from where I was sitting was open 24 hours, so if i ever needed to pee or get food or stay warm, then there it was.

What sucked was that my group was, i'm guessing, the 100th or so people on the line to buy it and at 8am is when they were suppose to let us in and at 6am is when the pre-ordered were suppose to pick theirs up. I dunno. I just think nintendo world should have made this more better. The fact that they had waves of preorders just buzzing by when it was 8, 830, 900, 930, 1000 and all in between was really annoying. They packed the stores like sardines while us people who camped to buy it at 8 couldn't get in as quickly as I had hoped. They should have told the preorder folks to come at 6 sharp and circle the other side of the store. I understand that they had over 1000 people coming in, but these people were just getting off the trains and walking into the store like royalty. lol. Sure I suppose I shouldn't be bitching about them since if i have preordered I would have probably done the same, lol, but you know, it just sucks.

I got in at 1015am. So, I was basically on the line for 13 hours. Got me really annoyed as hell, but after i got the Wii I just forgot about it, lol. You know how I am, never one to stay angry for too long. Plus I was just relieved that I could finally go home and get some sleep on a BED, but unfortunately I wasn't able to sleep on my bed. I had all this stuff to do at home and I was at my friend's house after I got the wii for a while, so I didn't get home till 8pm, then did the house thing, didn't sleep until 1230. Was going to wake up at 5 in the morning to study for my Bio test today, but I woke up late. I gotta get some better alarm clocks because I never recalled ever turning them off last night. Either that or my brother's a fucking dick.

Alright, well now that all this videogaming shananigans is over, I suppose I can just enjoy the week since it's turkey week.

October 27th...

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In school, now, mad bored. It's actually really intimidating to use the computer at school. Because i'm used to the whole computer behind my desk thing, but here all the computers are next to one another so you can always look over to what other people are viewing. Gives away the privacy. I'm getting used to it, i mean I got nothing I need to hide from these people. It's just computers, you know.

About to go to work in a few. I start at 230 so 15 minutes of nothing will happen. Maybe i'll play my psp until then.

The Crocodile Hunter, a.k.a Steve Irwin, is dead. Here's the link to the article. Just copy and paste it. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14663786/